4 Steps to Become an Encourager

If I were to ask you right now – “what is the kindest or most encouraging thing anyone has ever said to you?” Do you think you could answer that question? What if I were to ask you instead – “what is the most hurtful or discouraging thing anyone has ever said to you?” I would imagine you probably could answer that question even more clearly. Why? Our words have incredible power and lasting impact!  An encourager impacts our lives with their words.

We all need encouragement to keep going through the times of our lives.  I can remember both encouraging and discouraging conversations that I have had with other people. Encouraging words still warm the heart and strengthen me to keep serving the Lord and living for Him every day. Discouraging words still hurt my heart and if I allow myself to dwell on those unkind dialogs, I’ll want to quit more than ever.

I want to be an encourager of others. Encouragement really doesn’t come naturally to humans. We tend to find fault and like to focus on it to the point that we actually say something about it. We are taught in God’s Word to be kind, loving and edifying to other people. When we are critical and discouraging, not only do these words hurt others, but they also do not please the Lord.

The Bible says in Psalm 19:14, “Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer.” In order to glorify God, I must think and speak words that honor and please the Lord as I live my life before Him.

4 Steps to Become an Encourager

1.  Commit to give encouragement each day.

Decide you will an encourager and find those in your world you need to hear from you. It’s easy to blurt out negativity and hurtful words. Why not decide to give our encouraging words instead? Find the good in everyone and every situation you encounter in life.

2.  Be conscious of the impact our words have on those around us.

Our words have great power! We have the ability to build up or to destroy others with just a slip of the tongue. Those words ones out of the mouth cannot be retracted. Even if you apologize, they will be remembered and can have a damaging impact on those who hear them. On the flip side, when we choose to verbalize our positive and encouraging thoughts to others, those words will be remembered as well.

3.  Decide to give positive words even in negative situations.

Anyone can see an obvious flaw or negative situation and openly complain or criticize. Let’s be honest, the world is full of flawed people and those same people make for negative situations. Guess what? We are included in that group. How we choose to handle those problems and the situations that come with them matters greatly! If you will choose to respond in mercy and encouragement it can change the outcome of regardless the situation. Besides, when it’s your turn to make a mistake, isn’t that how you would like to be treated?

4.  Remember our words – both negative and positive – reveal our hearts and are eternally important.

Words are so important because they reveal your heart and who you really are as a person. The Bible says it best in Matthew 12:34-37,

““…for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.
A good man out of the good treasure of the heart bringeth forth good things: and an evil man out of the evil treasure bringeth forth evil things.
But I say unto you, That every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment.
For by thy words thou shalt be justified, and by thy words thou shalt be condemned.”

Who do your words reveal you to be? Are you an encourager or a discourager of people? Do others come to you when they need the strength to keep going or do they run the other way when they see you coming?

We must choose to encourage others. It will not come naturally, but only as we decide to allow the Lord to use us to build up those in our lives. The decision is up to you. Take these 4 steps and choose to become an encourager!