How to Keep the Ministry From Destroying You

 

There is nothing more wonderful that serving the Lord! He is such an awesome God and it is my honor and my joy to be in the ministry along side my husband. After college, we worked for many years in my father-in-law’s ministry, the Christian Law Association. God then led my husband into the pastorate in St. Petersburg, Florida. We lived in Florida for about 15 years and thought we’d never leave. God had other plans and led us to the Riverside, California area. We have been here since 2008. Our church families have been very different from one another, but we have loved them just as deeply. There were trials and difficulties in each ministry, but God has protected us and provided for every step of our journey. It hasn’t been the church, the location or title that have brought the joy, but rather it’s been the wonderful Christian people and our Jesus who have made it so amazing.

However, life in the ministry isn’t always fun – in fact, there are many discouragements, pitfalls, stresses and disappointments that people with other occupations don’t encounter. For most Christians, church is a part of their lives, but for those of us who minister in full-time positions it is our whole life. Because of this, we are more vulnerable to feeling the depth of rejection, unkindness and even heartlessness that can come when you deal with people and difficult situations.

These negatives can not only monopolize our thoughts, but drag us down and eventually, out of the ministry altogether. If we don’t deal with the struggles of the ministry properly and in a good and healthy way, they can destroy us.

This is exactly what Satan longs to do to you – destroy you and take you out of the ministry.
The Bible teaches us in II Corinthians 2:11 that we should not be ignorant of Satan’s devices or he will gain the advantage and do all he can to take us out. How then do we guard ourselves and be aware of what he is trying to do to us so we can survive?

How to Keep the Ministry From Destroying You

1. Change your self-perception.

Many women in the ministry struggle with feelings of inadequacy. They feel as though they are not good enough, pretty enough or talented enough to serve God. Satan will emphasize this repeatedly. The Lord on the other had has said that this is exactly how He likes to show His servants that His strength accommodates their weaknesses. In II Corinthians 12:9-10, God tells us that He longs to work through people who need Him. It is when we lean on the Lord to help us serve that His power rest upon us to fulfill the ministry.
So take heart, God is not looking for the best-qualified servant – He just wants us yielded and willing to be used.

2. Learn to adapt to changes.

Changes are a part of life. Changes can be both bad and good. If we are living then things are changing in our lives. This is also true in a ministry. It’s been said that a growing church is a changing church. Sometimes, the changes are happy and positive. Good changes come in the form of additional members, brand-new Christians and new facilities. Hard changes also come. Usually, they come in the form of grumpy church members who leave, families that move away for employment or even through death. These changes can be really hard to accept and can be so deeply discouraging. Understand that God is in control of every change that comes into life – both bad and good. Accept what God is doing.  We must give our hurts and disappointments to Him, and ask Him to help us adapt to the changes that come.

3. Anticipate criticism.

Criticism is hurtful. No way around it. People will criticize a pastor and his wife both personally and professionally. The ministry is difficult in and of itself. Satan causes us to feel like failures and inadequate. Then people come along – walking in the flesh and not the Spirit – and they judge our motives, call us names and feel free to say God is not with even with us. It’s hard because people are always watching. The pastor’s family lives in a fishbowl.  Sometimes, they assume they know us and feel free to pass judgment on how we lead and serve God. We have to learn to give it to the Lord and let God handle them. Sometimes they will adjust their attitudes and it will get better. Other times God will just remove them from the church. We cannot live life and serve God whole heartedly while worrying and obsessing about what other people think. Remember, there will always be people who love the pastor and his family and praise what’s happening and there will always be people who don’t like the pastor and his family and will criticize.  It’s all right. We don’t base our service to the Lord upon the reviews of people!

4. Remember your purpose in life.

Women wear many hats and fulfill a lot of roles, both at home and in the ministry when they are married to a pastor. Everything we do is important and holds eternal value. But in order to keep the pressure from crushing us while serving God, we must keep the main purpose of our lives first and foremost in all thoughts and actions. What is your life’s purpose? It’s not the roles you fill or the jobs you accomplish. Your life’s purpose is to please your God in everything you say, do or feel. The Apostle Paul said it best in II Corinthians 5:9, “Wherefore we labour, that, whether present or absent, we may be accepted of him.” It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks of us or the success or failure in the ministry. Our purpose in life mandates that above all else, we please the Lord.

5. Maintain the right perspective.

The ministry includes a lot of hurt, doesn’t it? We experience betrayal, heartache, grief, loss and disappointment on a regular basis. If a servant has gone through these great trials and are still serving the Lord, it’s because they have kept their eyes on Jesus and maintained the right perspective on what has happened. Keeping our focus on Christ and remembering we labor for Him will help us keep going when we feel like quitting. I hate to tell you this, but there are more difficult situations coming in life. Honestly, it’s just how it is. How do we continue to deal with it and keep it from destroying you and ripping our hearts out?

We must remember that we don’t always see the whole picture of the battle between good and evil in our life and ministry. However, God does. We must remember the story of Joseph. In Genesis 50:20 it says, “But as for you, ye thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good,” and not only was this true in the life of Joseph, but it’s also true for you and me. There is a purpose for our suffering while ministering for our Lord. Remember that and keep the right perspective.

It is honestly the joy of my existence to serve Jesus Christ with my life. I know that this is the case for you as well, my fellow laborer. Whoever you are, know that I have prayed for you as I have written this to help. Most importantly, remember you serve along side Jesus. He is with you. You are never alone. Don’t forget – this earth isn’t home. We’re only here on a work visa and soon we will be with the One that we are living for and serving now. Take heart and apply these few truths to keep the ministry from destroying you today!